[skydriver]

Our Tax System Explained: Bar Stool Economics
Suppose that every day, ten men go out for beer and the bill for all ten comes to $100. If they paid their bill the way we pay our taxes, it would go something like this:

The first four men (the poorest) would pay nothing.
The fifth would pay $1.
The sixth would pay $3.
The seventh would pay $7.
The eighth would pay $12.
The ninth would pay $18.
The tenth man (the richest) would pay $59.

So, that's what they decided to do.

The ten men drank in the bar every day and seemed quite happy with the arrangement, until one day, the owner threw them a curve. 'Since you are all such good customers,' he said, 'I'm going to reduce the cost of your daily beer by $20.' Drinks for the ten now cost just $80.

The group still wanted to pay their bill the way we pay our taxes so the first four men were unaffected. They would still drink for free.

But what about the other six men - the paying customers? How could they divide the $20 windfall so that everyone would get his 'fair share?' They realized that $20 divided by six is $3.33. But if they subtracted that from everybody's share, then the fifth man and the sixth man would each end up being paid to drink his beer. So, the bar owner suggested that it would be fair to reduce each man's bill by roughly the same amount, and he proceeded to work out the amounts each should pay.

And so:
The fifth man, like the first four, now paid nothing (100% savings).
The sixth now paid $2 instead of $3 (33%savings).
The seventh now pay $5 instead of $7 (28%savings).
The eighth now paid $9 instead of $12 (25% savings).
The ninth now paid $14 instead of $18 (22% savings).
The tenth now paid $49 instead of $59 (16% savings).

Each of the six was better off than before. And the first four continued to drink for free. But once outside the restaurant, the men began to compare their savings.

'I only got a dollar out of the $20,'declared the sixth man. He pointed to the tenth man,' but he got $10!'

'Yeah, that's right,” exclaimed the fifth man. 'I only saved a dollar, too. It's unfair that he got ten times more than I got'

'That's true!!' shouted the seventh man. 'Why should he get $10 back when I got
only two? The wealthy get all the breaks!'

'Wait a minute,' yelled the first four men in unison. 'We didn't get anything at all. The system exploits the poor!'

The nine men surrounded the tenth and beat him up.

The next night the tenth man didn't show up for drinks so the nine sat down and had beers without him. But when it came time to pay the bill, they discovered something important. They didn't have enough money between all of them for even half of the bill!

And that, ladies and gentlemen, journalists and college professors, is how our tax system works. The people who pay the highest taxes get the most benefit from a tax reduction. Tax them too much, attack them for being wealthy, and they just may not show up anymore. In fact, they might start drinking overseas where the atmosphere is somewhat friendlier.

David R. Kamerschen, Ph.D.
Professor of Economics
University of Georgia

For those who understand, no explanation is needed.
For those who do not understand, no explanation is possible.

[Captain Eddie]

EXCELLENT QUOTE, SKYDIVER! Too bad it's not really funny, however. I DO get it! I'm sure Hillary and Barack do not, however. Or, maybe they do, but they just ignore that knowledge......

[skydriver]

Originally Posted by Captain Eddie

EXCELLENT QUOTE, SKYDIVER! Too bad it's not really funny, however. I DO get it! I'm sure Hillary and Barack do not, however. Or, maybe they do, but they just ignore that knowledge......

Thanks Captain, but come November, I just hope those 10 beers don't end up costing $150.00.

[Rush104]

There were these two fellers standin' on a bridge, a-goin' to the bathroom.
One feller said "the water's cold" and the other feller said "the water's deep".
mmmmm I believe one feller comes from Arkansas.
Get it?

[kabelace]

Radio Conversation This is the transcript of the ACTUAL radio conversation of a US Naval ship and the Canadians, off the coast of Newfoundland, Oct 95. Radio conversation released by the Chief of Naval Operations 10-10-95. CANADIANS: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the South, to avoid a collision. AMERICANS: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the North, to avoid a collision. CANADIANS: Negative. You will have to divert your course 15 degrees to the South to avoid a collision. AMERICANS: This is the Captain of a US Navy ship. I say again, divert YOUR course. CANADIANS: Negative. I say again, You will have to divert your course. AMERICANS: THIS IS THE AIRCRAFT CARRIER US LINCOLN. THE SECOND LARGEST SHIP IN THE UNITED STATES ATLANTIC FLEET, WE ARE ACCOMPANIED BY THREE DESTROYERS, THREE CRUISERS, AND NUMEROUS SUPPORT VESSELS. I DEMAND THAT YOU CHANGE YOUR COURSE 15 DEGREES NORTH, SAY AGAIN, THAT'S 15 DEGREES NORTH, OR COUNTERMEASURES WILL BE UNDERTAKEN TO ENSURE THE SAFETY OF THIS SHIP. ... .. . CANADIANS: We are a lighthouse. Your call!

[Cruver Collecter]

Originally Posted by kabelace

Heard that one before, and it is always funny.

[skydriver]

I have heard that one before kabelace....but it was an American lighthouse and a French naval ship......not that I am trying to insinuate anything bad about the French.

[smartd]

The C.O.'s Morning Briefing:
>>>
>>>
>>> The Commanding Officer of a Regiment in the U. S. Marine Corps was
>>> about to start the morning briefing to his Staff and Battalion and
>>> Company Commanders. While waiting for the coffee machine to finish its
>>> brewing, he decided to pose a question to all assembled. He explained
>>> that his wife had been a bit frisky the night before and he failed to
>>> get his usual amount of sound sleep. He posed the question of just how
>>> much of sex was 'work' and how much of it was 'pleasure?' The X.O.
>>> chimed in with 75~25% in favour of work.
>>>
>>> A Captain said it was 50-50%.
>>>
>>> The Colonel's Aide, a Lt., responded with 25~75% in favour of
>>> pleasure, depending on his state of inebriation at the time.
>>>
>>> There being no consensus, the Colonel turned to the Private First
>>> Class who was in charge of making the coffee. What was HIS opinion?
>>>
>>> With out hesitation, the young Private First Class responded,
>>> "Sir, it absolutely has to be 100% pleasure."
>>>
>>> The Colonel was surprised and, as you might guess, asked why?
>>>
>>> "Well Sir, began the Private First Class, "if there was any work
>>> involved, the officers would have me doing it for them."
>>>
>>> The room fell silent.

[Shawn 507]

Amen brother !!!

[skydriver]

I second Shawn's comment.